Some days, my warrior spirit stands unbreakable
And some days I sink to the ground, breathless and broken
Photo by Xuan Nguyen on Unsplash
I write what I feel. After days of wielding my sword. My arms now shake under the weight of holding up my world.
I suspect I’m not alone in this feeling. Especially the moms and dads, stretched thin, grasping at the pieces of the reality they built, trying to hold it together, not just for themselves, but for their children.
My children are teens and young adults now, and over the past few years, their world—the one we carefully constructed for them, promising it would stand strong against the mightiest of winds—has started to unravel. The once harmless game of lava we taught them has taken on a new, sobering meaning.
Back then, it was playful: leaping from one square patch of linoleum to the next, avoiding the imaginary fiery pit in between. But now, it feels less like a childhood game and more like a brutal initiation into adulthood, a practice in survival that they must suddenly perfect.
My body, already scorched and worn from years of sacrifice, feels close to breaking. I’ve thrown myself down again and again, so they can walk across me, so they don’t fall. And now, I have to dig deep, deeper than I ever have, to find the words that will convince them this gauntlet won’t last forever.
How can I tell them to keep striving, to stand for what they believe in, to fight with everything they have, when I feel like I barely have any fight left in me? How can I pass on courage when I’m running low on my own reserves?
But this is what parents do in times like these. We march on for our children. Even when our legs shake, even when exhaustion fills our bones. We march on, because that’s how we show them that, even when the world burns around us, love and perseverance are still the strongest forces we have.
So, we keep going. We keep holding up the world for them, until one day, they’re strong enough to hold it themselves. And maybe, just maybe, they’ll leap over that last patch of lava and find solid ground.
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