Kill The Buddha
Or you will forever be lost in its shadow
I recall my first Aha moment as I took my early baby steps onto the path towards enlightenment.
OMG what high. I suddenly felt as if I knew it all. Not like I did when I was 15, this time, I really did know it all.
I then spent several years running around telling everyone I knew it all. I was going to save humanity. Heal the world. I was gifted with the light and my purpose was to spread it.
I was definitely spreading something, and then one day in a ridiculously dramatic way, I fell off the stage and landed flat on my face.
The whack to my head allowed me to consider, maybe I should just focus on saving myself. How utterly selfish, right?
Or is it?
The thing is, once I started focusing on saving myself, I began to see what my savior complex was hiding from me. And how all the things I saw wrong in the world, were really just parts of myself that needed work. It’s so much easier and whole lot more EGO fulfilling to assume it's out there that needs the healing and that I, with my one, newly found piece of wisdom gained was the elixir all of humanity needed. And to think I have it!
That pit of ego gratification is easy to miss in the early stages of our awakening. It usually takes a few “humbling” falls from grace before we realize that we don’t know shit and we can barely save ourselves to come to the understanding that in saving ourselves, healing ourselves and doing the real work, is, in fact what is going to save humanity.
I am probably going to piss off a few of my peeps with this… but I hate to break it to you, but a few weekend courses and some secret symbols does not make you a master of anything. It simply means your ego bought the certificate. Don’t get me wrong, I am a huge fan of energy work, its just that the notion that you need secret symbols and a special “master” cert you paid a pretty penny for is…well marketing. Ironically, many of those masters get super angry at big pharma for selling the same snake oil, just in different bottles.
You will not solve all of your problems in a weekend seminar in Cost Rica. I mean you’ll be in Costa Rica, which is nice, but eventually you will come home, and your teenager will still push every button available, and you will lose your kambucha over and over again.
Doom scrolling the latest fear based “Us Vs. The Reptile people”, “Twin Flame or bust”, “RFK is alive” YouTube thread is not raising your consciousness and making you more aware and awake, or wise or more in the know. It’s actually lowering your consciousness and keeping you in fear and exactly where “They” want you..It’s a trap…
If you have to inform me, or anyone that you are an empath a light worker or a star child, it is a sure sign that you are not any of those things. (Actually, you are anyway…we all are 😏) But exclaiming it, is just your ego playing the role and using those terms as an identity marker to make yourself feel better and more special than anyone else.
None of this is actually helping humanity. It may be causing more harm than good. When we think we can become masters in a weekend we stop actually trying to master anything. When we simply carve out a weekend to solve our problems, we’re not solving them, just masking them in pithy affirmations. When we focus on it being them, we don’t have to focus on it being us.
It’s all just mental masturbation. A nifty mind game to avoid the real work needed.
To truly understand this reality requires depth, nuance, and a lot of deep soul wrenching exploration and it’s gonna take some time, maybe even a lifetime (or two)
These days when someone asks me if I have seen that video on transhumanism, I say, no, I was painting. When someone asks me if I’m interested in a reiki session I say, no thank you, I’m sitting under my tree. I mean, if it works for you, do it. But check in and make sure its actually working or is it masking your opportunity for authentic connection and growth. Is it bringing you joy or causing you to be afraid. Is it asking you too fight or is it asking you to expand?
After all my years wandering this forrest looking for the light, I’ve finally figured out I just needed to sit down and be with it. It has been with me all along. It ins’t on YouTube, it isn’t in Costa Rica (although…hey go to Costa Rica), that yoga teacher isn’t any better than you, there are no masters, and we all have some wisdom to share. Let it all be your teacher.
Kill The Buddha…
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